My Journey

Be the Light.

You don’t put a candle under your blanket, but instead, to light that candle for everyone to see that light.

“Matthew 5:15”

Let Go. Live Life. Let God.

2011 probably went by too fast, it was one of those roller coaster ride that put me down, and kept me up. I enjoyed 2011, although it was one of those toughest times I’ve been through.

But why am back on tumblr just to vent, or share how this year of Hare treated me? I guess it feels good to be able to write again, to let out my emotions, feelings, and thoughts in a place where only some can see it, and very few can judge. It’s not like other social networking sites such as Facebook, Myspace, or Google+ where 100s of friends and strangers make intriguing comments about their short meaningful status without even knowing the reasons. Well, that’s the point of having those sites, they were made for publicity, everyone can say their own opinions and ask questions whether you like it or not. “I am all for freedom of expression and opinion on … other social networking sites, i too post whatever opinion i have and we are all free to do so.”

So, to start off, I am just sharing my thoughts and feelings to be well understood. Sure, there’s nothing to explain nor reasons to unfold some stories of my personal decisions, but I guess, I just want to share this to the people that never left me, and showed me some care. :) This sounds so dramatic, lol, but I’m not saying “goodbye,” instead,  start something fresh and new for 2012…a good change and new beginnings for me—-and maybe for everyone as well. I’m not leaving any note that I won’t be “there”, but maybe not as much as I would have to…this thing I would call an “opportunity” will  never leave my heart because it has been my passion and so I grabbed it, but I know, the time will come when you have to let go of the things you love in able to appreciate yourself more, you know? I’m not saying that I am letting go (100%) of this “opportunity” but somehow, I want to explore and grabbed more other opportunities to enhance, mold and teach myself. These “other” opportunities I’m talking about are: family, self, and respect…

Many expectations from so many people, yet, I don’t even have that much expectations for myself as they do. Lol. I want to keep going, and I’m not quitting, but I just need time and space to give myself what I deserve. It may seem like I am a quitter, and that’s okay…deep in my heart, my service will never stop. Anywho, I am not denying that there was never a reason of my sudden decision. Yes, I get tired and hurt too…I know I can’t ask/expect everyone around me to understand, nor listen to me, and I am fine with that. RESPECT. If trust is something that we need to change, so does respect, right? I showed no hatred nor revenge to those who disrespected me, but yes, there were times I was irritated, annoyed, mad, and even questioned myself “why.” Although, I asked for some peace and time, sadly, I think they misunderstood and took my requests in a different way. It’s okay though, I tried my best to be patient and understanding because I know it won’t do any  good if I fireback or start hating…. A close friend of mine whom I consider like a family/brother once told me “Just love and respect yourself and focus on those who appreciate you. You usually won’t get anything from ignorant people…”  I thank God for using that person to remind me how much I am loved and respected by others. I gave so many chances, and forgave easily…and i guess, some people just took advantaged of me being so forgiving(yet, I don’t regret…i can forgive easily and as many times as I can because even I, make mistakes too…) However,  coming from realization that I also need to give myself that respect, patient, and understanding that I always give to others as well. There will always be people who will give opinions, and misunderstood you, but always remember that never lose respect for yourself as much as others will try to take that away or test your credibility.

As the new year arrived, I know that my journey isn’t yet over…more challenges to face, and obstacles to overcome. It may be one of the hardest  decisions to make, but one of the best decisions I will choose/chose. Thank you for being part of my journey of 2011. I hope and pray that we all find new beginnings and hope for 2012. For now, my service focus on my family(who needs me, and I need the most); self/life(that He blessed me, I need to find myself in other areas as well); and to you/friends (continue to be an inspiration to many, and grow independently). My decision that I will leave you assure you that my focus on God will continue. :)

Thank You & HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

‘til we see again! :)

in other words,

Let Go. Live Life. Let God.

It’s confession time, 2011 is almost over. Inbox me something you have always wanted to ask or something you have always wanted to tell me.

(Source: seungri-idolanon, via hannahsmiles)